Run with me in my perpetual haste. Meander with me in my devious course. Wander with me in my desperate search. Slalom with me through my discordant vacillation. Wade with me through my hopeless misery. Sink with me in my unrequited love. Spin with me in my eddying emotion. Cruise with me through my youthful fantasy. Flow with me in my surging spontaneity. Swim with me in my divine euphony. Float with me in my phantasmal heaven. Whirl with me in my fragile bubble. Fly with me as I escape reality

Thursday, April 28, 2005

Traffic jam in Bangalore

This morning on my way to work, being too sleepy to read, I decided to put my book down and just let Radio City lull me to sleep. Just as I was entering lala land, I was shaken out of my stupor when a large cow just walked across in front of my van with no warning whatsoever. The driver was caught unawares and I got a huge jolt when he hit the brakes, barely missing the cow. The ironical part is that while there were so many kind souls relieved that the cow was safe, the cow itself (that ideally should have been scared out of its wits) blissfully continued crossing the road without batting so much as an eyelid!

After this insightful experience that was an eye opener to the indifference of cows/buffaloes and other four legged pedestrians to the city's traffic no hope of sleeping remained. So I watched all the activity happening on the road.

The insanities:

There were these crazy car drivers who blare their horns away knowing full well that they can't move an inch forward/backward or in any direction at all.

There were young couples on bikes who are too busy hugging/talking/fighting/arguing to notice what the din is all about. Had the cow been on their path, the cow, guy and girl would be in some hospital now.

There were guys/gals on motorbikes/scooters who seemed to prefer the foot path to the road, thereby driving all the pedestrians to the middle of the road.

There were cyclists who jumped in front of your vehicle every now and then. And of course you get abused for not reacting in time if you crash into them.

Pedestrains who randomly decide to cross the road and are obviously unaware of the zebra crossing concept, just close their eyes, put their hand out, look straight and start crossing the road. There is a long line of cars with squealing brakes, but they walk on. At times they do this in pairs, completely lost in conversation, or even better- in large groups.

There are beggars who hold on to your leg or the car window and don't let go when the light turns green. Now you have to make a choice between pushing the beggar away, driving away and not care about him/her getting hurt or shut your ears to all the honking from behind while you fish out the money or begging the beggar to move and let you go. Whew! What a predicament....

There is the omnipresent auto driver who first wants to overtake you from the left and then drives right in front of you going zig zag zig zag........Now that is a sight! Finally when you are all set to overtake him, he just turns right without indication. You are lucky if you are still driving after this episode.If you abuse him, he will stop,look back, glare, stop the auto, walk all the way back, scream obscenties you've never heard before and then continue on his journey.

And the list is endless. Being a participant in this drama is just too traumatic and a terrible way to start the day. But observing the scene from a safe distance like a terrace or a shop window is safe and even entertaining.

The mad house hunt

Every website that publishes classified ads, copy and paste of all promising ads and a hundred phone calls later, I'm still in the mad rat race in pursuit of a house to live in. It's a demoralizing experience to think you will get thrown out of your house in the near future.

One thought leads to another and I imagine myself standing on the road with all my bags threatening to burst open at the slightest jolt. Now add to this the apprehension of a person living out of home for the first time. Shudder shudder!!!

The ads:
They reveal nothing really, no landmark, no specific area....the descriptions are typically:-

"Heart of the city" (read walk 2 km on a mud road to reach here)
"1500 sq ft" (The fine print- carpet area 800sq ft. the rest of it is your share of the car park, terrace etc., I guess)
"Brand apartment in posh (read uninhabited, sparse human population, deserted) residential area"(looks like they'd rather not commit on the "newness" of the house. Can't they run a spell/grammar check on an online ad?)

The hunt:
We (Me and 2 others) took a chance and went see one of these houses.
We call the owner. He's very sweet and says "come over anytime".
Time to go - we ask for directions and got a series of lefts, rights, lanes and landmarks which form a hazy picture. So we set off in a car, finally reach the first landmark in sight and then stop to ask for directions. It's amazing how people come forward to help. Two guys jumped forward to help. One says "Straight jaaoo, dead end me left hogi, seedha hogu, aur ek dead end aayega, alli right" That was Kannada, Hindi and English in one sentence. The guy next to him wakes up suddenly and says "not left right". I wonder which of the left turns he was referring to. So ultimatey after stopping every few yards and 3-4 U-turns later, we reached the place.Only to find that it's located in one remote corner of the heart of the city. Hence is still qualifies as heart of the city, I guess. This is a conspiracy against poor house seekers.

This takes the cake:
Due to the (amazing) connectivity of the place to other parts of the city, we had to rule it out as an option. But alas, this wisdom came too late... we decided this when we were at the gate of the apartment. The whole episode was a waste of fuel, time and effort.

….And stop not till the goal is reached:
Today it starts all over again.... I have 2 houses on my list...

One of the ads reads (I’m quoting from the ad):

"Ideally located in the heart of the city".

One should understand that this is only the "ideal" scenario. Reality could be anything at all. I hope it turns out to be interesting at least...

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

Is this creative block????

I've just been posting forward after forward all week.

The words simply refuse to flow. I find nothing worth writing about. Not that there is nothing.... but I think I refuse to see it. I start on something and forget where I started. I manage to put a few paragraphs together...I read it again and delete it, disgusted with my own writing. I have no clue why this is happening. Is it just a case of creative block, or a lack of interest in the world around me, or is it that I'm just too lazy? It can't be laziness because I've been very busy getting through my long to-do list... Surely it can't be lack of things to write about either. Seems like the days are drifting past in a dim haze. I'm down in the dumps, glum, morose.....

This week's summary-
1.Acclimatized to my new team
2.Unsuccessful in finding roomies to move into a new house
3.Spent and still spending money like water
4.Got myself a book to make a to-do list everyday. Pats on my back, every item is checked at the end of the day.
5. I've been reading reading reading and reading some more. I'm making the time I guess.
6.I'm being bombarded with information. Now I understand the term "Information Explosion". My head's swirling with all the details.
8.Been spending huge amounts of time brooding/staring into space/thinking about life in general

Is this life?

Friday, April 22, 2005

What a french kiss!!!


This is one mega kiss...

Monday, April 18, 2005

Chandramukhi - Butchering of a good concept

Manichitrathaazhu was a sheer pleasure to watch. It would have taken considerable research to make it so realistic. It was sheer genius. The theme was serious, so was the movie, naturally. That is one thing about Malayalam cinema... they have mainstream tragedy, comedy, thrillers etc. They don't have a dash of masala for the sake of entertainment value....


Some doubts.....

1. Why Rajni for such an intelligent role?
2. Why try to create mass appeal for such an intellectual concept?
3. Need the aim behind every movie be making money out of it, making it a box office hit?
4. Why can't the movie be made keeping in mind the audience who it is really intended for?
5. Why does there need to be a component of everything in every movie to satisfy all strata of the audience?

E.g. for Q5:-

->Chandramukhi had 4- 5 useless songs that sprung from nowhere, the lyrics were full of advice for the public in true "Thalaivar style", no purpose whatsoever. And of course, his dancing abilities were stunning, in the lines of an exercise drill.

->The SNAKE????? Why was it there? Was it a tribute to the supreme, ever so successful and "funny" comedy track of Annamalai?

-> That guy who stuck to Akilandeswari looks like he begged to be in the movie to show off his 6 pack abs in a single fight, apart from giving a smug, all knowing smile every now and then. I still don't get the purpose of his role.

-> Are they establishing a neelambari, akilandeswari, other "villis"...sequence??? I wonder what the next one will be...

->And of course, Jyotika... In Manichitrathaazhu the last song is a true classical dance number by Shobana who is a very good classical dancer? When the role demands one, then why not? In the last song Jyotika makes a fool of herself dancing like a lunatic.

-> The story started and ended in the last half an hour. The technical terms
from psychology were delivered with no effort whatsoever to help people understand the concepts. It was aimed more at showcasing Rajni's talent at doing intelligent roles.

-> I’m still trying to understand the rationale behind making Rajni the one Jyokita imagines to be the King... why does the limelight have to be on him even when it makes sense otherwise?( Can’t beat Malayalam movies when it comes to logic.)

On the whole they have butchered the original movie.....

The only good thing about the movie I can think about is that at least the storyline is intact. In a way it shows the inability to conceive of an original idea. If it is an effort to make a good idea reach a larger audience, why not deliver it giving due reverence to the concept or the theme rather than adapting it to fit one man’s clichéd style?

I know these views are subject to anger/ criticism from die hard Rajni fans. But they are my views all the same...

Thursday, April 14, 2005

Potter Hater...

Harry Potter Spoof

Looks like someone does not want to give credit to J.K. Rowling for her "creative genius". lol !!!

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

Who is the judge?

How do anyone’s opinions but for ours matter in any way?

We have been conditioned for eons to care about what others have to say about our actions. We have been taught to value the opinions of every tom, dick and harry in every phase of life. Do these opinions really matter at all? Why then, should we care?

Consider a prostitute…. What comes to mind is a woman of low morals, a woman who trades her flesh day in and day out. But it is her profession. We wax eloquent that profession is a personal choice. Then why is it that the prostitute’s choice is criticized till there is not a shred of self respect left in her? I’m not one to argue that every prostitute is a victim of her fate or circumstances. I’d rather say that she chooses it for herself and she does so knowing fully well, the implication of her choice.

Coming back to the issue of opinions of people…..An average passer by who will be more than glad to spend a few hundred bucks “to attain nirvana” at night, assumes a moral high ground the next morning and scorns the prostitute’s profession. We worry about the opinions of such hypocrites. We put up our values for examination by such spineless morons. This might seem rude or offensive. But we really need to question if anyone is worthy of passing judgment on another’s actions.

I firmly believe that our actions are governed by what we think is right and that we do only those things that our value set permits us to. Aren’t we ourselves the highest approving authorities of our own actions? Then why do we search elsewhere for approval? Why do we hesitate to look within? Why don’t we grow in confidence when deep within we feel we are doing the right thing? Instead we keep furtively searching for approval from our peers, from our superiors, from just about anybody.

We take so much pain to make sure we always stay well within the allowed boundaries of freedom as drawn by the society. We do things the same clichéd way again and again, lest we are different from our fellowmen. We fear to do things our own way, we fear to set new precedents, lest we are singled out and ridiculed. We instantly weaken our stand on things and give up our ideals when the protective web of people we have woven around ourselves is threatened. We ourselves extinguish every spark of idea we might have. All this we do in the name of fitting into society. We hide behind the façade of a “social animal”.

Why do we need to be social animals? Why can’t we just be human beings, unique human beings? Uniqueness is not appreciated and fostered. We willingly push ourselves into the abyss of mediocrity. We take pains to hide every bit of individuality in us by trying to be just like others, and all this just for mere acceptance from a bunch of faceless people.

Is all this really worth it, rather, are they really worth it? If they are, then who are they?


They never cease to baffle me.....

They come in many varieties:

1. There are those who have no clue what they are talking about. But they drone endlessly. The meaning of "TEACHING" is completely lost on them. You sit in one of these classes and you can write a book - "1001 Ways to weather through boring classes". Phew!!!!!!

2. The second kind is those who come to class determined to deliver a good lecture, they begin well with a great introduction and before you know it, you go zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

3. Then there are those who just talk to themselves or to the blackboard, or they just have a conversation with the front benchers. Whether they really know anything at all about their subject, remains a mystery forever.

4. There are those who want to take every doubt offline. “Meet me after the class and we’ll discuss it” is the only answer for any doubt raised.

5. There are those who give you a 1000 word write up to do while they take a trip to slumbertown and back.

6. There are those who say ok/u know/clear/like etc. after every other word. The biggest entertainment could be to count the number of fillers the professor uses in a class.

7. There are those who know the subject but not the English language and those who know English but not their subject. And of course those do not know both.

.............and the list of variants is endless.

I had to blog about this because they spoil most of my days making me sit through one of these rotten classes. And I'm off to one them now.

Saturday, April 02, 2005

Drifting along with a shut mind

In every color there is light;
Yet there is darkness in life,
For we move on
with our eyes shut tight.

Every mind can take flight;
Yet like dead wood, we drift,
For we know not
the existence of height.

Every wall can be broken;
Yet we build taller walls,
For fear of losing
the shadow of the very walls we build.

Every dream can be a reality;
Yet we scorn lady luck,
For we often forget
to wake up from our sleep.
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